One Year Ago Today...

We met our beautiful and spicy Jiangxi girl for the very first time! She has grown so much in the year that she has been with us and is so much a part of our family that it is hard to remember a time when she was not here and yet I can vividly remember the timid little girl that waddled through that hotel door with such a brave little face. She sighed so deeply with resignation and accepted without tears that this was her fate. She studied us so intently for the next few days and spoke very little. I was certain though a few times that she was telling us off but our guide said , "Oh no she has very good manners, very polite girl!" As the days passed I suspected even more that she was not the timid little girl that she was acting like. By the time we got to Guangzhou, she was opening up more and more. Within five minutes of meeting our guide there, she told us "Oh my, do you ever have a bossy one!" I KNEW IT and she has been trying her best to boss us ever since!

This is the first photo we ever saw of her and she looks so serious and somber. I wondered the first time I looked into these eyes, why someone had not just scooped her up! I stared into those eyes knowing and wondering at the same time if this was finally our daughter! I stared at her wispering "Is it you?"

The day finally came when we met for the first time! She was so resigned, so scared and stunningly beautiful! We thought that she handled everything so well, but knowing her now we know how truly scared she really was. But she made up her mind that she would make the best of things and she has blossomed ever since!

Today she is a happy, affectionate, loving - but still bossy girl that LOVES life. She does everything with 100% conviction. She is always described to us as having such a commanding personality. Someone that demands and attracts attention when she walks into a room. She loves people, animals, gymnastics and horseback riding. She adores her sister, her puppies and her Mama! We just simply adore her!

Rylee has taught us so much about love, life, family and parenting. She has challenged us in so many ways and yet, she fits in to our family so perfectly! We are amazed everyday at this miracle that is our daughter and grateful beyond words for the trust we have been given to call her our own.

Happy Family Day Rylee - We love you so much!!!

Pumpkins and a hurting Daddy!

As much as we love the south and the perfect fall weather, we do miss the apple orchard/pumpkin patch tradition we had up north. There is no fresh cider and donuts when we go to the pumpkin patch - however, you can pick cotton and stuff it in your pockets to give to your Mama later as a sweet and special gift!

The girls have been wanting to decorate pumpkins, so we did that today. Here are our results:

Poor Daddy has a muscle spasm in his back and has been hobbling around pretty good today. He told us that it felt like a knife was in his back. Rylee looked at him very serious for a minute and then lifted his shirt to study his back. Finally she announced "Daddy there is no knife in there - you is fine Daddy! Now come on get up, you is fine!!!"

When is it too much homework?

Rylee was working at the table and Hanna was working on the computer, both doing their homework. I left Rylee at the table writing letters and went to help Hanna, right around the corner in the other room. I was gone about five minutes before heading back to see if Rylee needed help. It was strangely quiet as I rounded the corner and there I found her sound asleep! So sound asleep that she didn't even wake up when I picked her up from the chair and laid her on the couch. These kindergarten days sure can be exhausting!

What the letter "Nn" looks like

We are working hard on learning letters and their sounds here. Rylee wants to know why Mama laughs every time we get to the letter "N". She has to read the letter, and then make the sound. This is what "Nn" looks like - EVERY TIME!

Typical Dinner Conversation

We always have dinner together as a family and since Rylee joined us the conversations grow more and more interesting as she increases her understanding and uses her ever increasing vocabulary.

She starts the way she always does - "What this food Mama, is this fish?"
Me: "No Rylee, it's not fish. Why do you think we are always having fish?"
Rylee: "WELL, in China I have fish once - I don't like fish!"
Me: "This is a burger"
Rylee: "I don't want this - I want rabioli"
Me: "You had ravioli after school, you can't have ravioli for every meal"
Rylee: "BUT I WANT TOO MAMA!"
Dad: "Rylee try your burger"
Rylee: "OKAY FINE" as she stabs the burger with her fork and lifts the entire thing to her mouth, "This too big - I can't eat it! AND I don't like COW!"
Dad: "Ravioli has cow in it and you like it!"
Rylee: "EEEWwww NO's NOT Daddy, look!" She holds out both hands raising one finger at a time as she lists off all the things she will not eat - "I don't eat cow, fish, pig, duck, cat, dog, turtle, or all the stuff - I just eat this and this" as she points to her bread and french fries.
Hanna pipes in now: "You eat bird"
Rylee: "DON'T SAY THAT HANNA!"
Hanna: "In China you did - you ate a bird! Didn't she Mom?"
Me: "Yes, Rylee in China you did eat a bird"
Rylee: "Hey - Hanna and Mama you being mean me - both you be mean me!"
Hanna: "No we aren't you really did eat the bird - you ate the head and you liked it - right Mom?"
Me: "Well you really did like it Rylee, in fact you were very excited about it and seemed to think it was a big treat!"
Rylee: "We not talk this anymore - you not nice me!"


Here are some pictures from July and August:

"I no have my China little Mom now"

Rylee nonchalantly started the conversation as I was getting her ready for bed. The rest went like this:

Me: "No, not anymore"

Rylee: "Now I have you Mama" she turns to face me and places her small hand on the side of my face. She looks me in the eye and continues, "Now I have you and my Daddy and my Sist. I likea you Mama, I love you! I really happy you my Mama now. I don't wanta go China all the day Mama. In China I don't have you and Daddy and my Sist. I happy now Mama, you not in China an in China I no have a Mommy. Can I stay you Mama?"

Me (talking over the extremely large lump in my throat): "Oh sweetheart, Mama loves you too and I am so happy that you are here with us forever. You will always have Mommy and Daddy and your Sister, always, everyday no matter where we are or where we go you will always have me and Daddy and Hanna. You are my baby now and Mama loves you forever. You stay with Mama today, tomorrow and all the days! You will always have a Mommy now, I love you so much my sweet baby!"

Rylee: "Thank you Mama, thank you I stay you Mama!"

Rylee goes to Kindergarten!

Hard to believe that summer is done already, but Rylee was so excited to go to "big school" on Thursday. She rode the bus with the big kids and Hanna made sure that she found her classroom. We got up extra early and the girls were ready about 40 minutes before it was time to go catch the bus. So much to their annoyance, I had plenty of time to snap pictures before they left. Once it was time to go we got half way down the driveway and Rylee said "Okay Mama see you later - you stay here, I big girl - I get bus myself!" I said WHAT??? Mama goes with you to the bus stop and I will wait there until the bus comes! Her response: "Awwww Modder!!! I can do it myself, oh man - Mama you wait here!" So I went with them to the bus stop and gave them hugs and kisses when the bus got there. Once she spotted the bus Rylee never looked back. She got on the bus holding hands with her big sis and carrying a backpack that looked about the same size as her. As the door closed behind these sisters, my eyesight blurred and their words from the morning rang through my head "Are you going to cry Mom? Don't do it - don't you cry!" (Hanna) and Rylee echoing her "Don't do it MAMA - you cry Mama?"

Yes Ry - Mama cry - just a little bit!

The sweetest story...

If you want to read about the sweetest gotcha day go check out my online friends story of meeting her new 8 year old son. He is amazing and we can't wait to meet Ty when he comes home to Alabama! What a sweet boy!!! Click here to go to their story Http://www.sayhi2ty.blogspot.com/

A Rylee update will follow soon!

Rylee sees an "old" friend...

We just got back from a trip to the beach where we were able to meet up with another family that has adopted twice from the same orphanage that Rylee is from. They have a teenage daughter that helped to care for Rylee a couple of years ago. I was a little nervous about her reaction but knew from pictures that Rylee does remember this girl. I had told Rylee that we were going to visit this friend and I am sure no matter how much I tried to explain that we were going to Florida to see her, Ry thought that we were going to China. She would ask every day "Mama we go China today, see my friend?" I would tell her that we were not going to China but that her friend has her own family and they live in Florida and that we were going to FL to visit. Finally the day before we left she told me with a very serious face "Mama, I don't want go to China, I stay with Mama! I wanna stay you Mama!". I sat her on my lap and told her that we are her family and that she stays with us always. We are going to visit and play with her friend, but then we would all come home together. She said "Okay Mama, it okay".

We got to the beach Thursday and the beach and pool were a smashing success! Rylee loved the water and even the sand and waves of the ocean! Friday the other family arrived and Rylee grabbed right on to the 5 - almost 6- year old girls, but essentially ignored the older girl that Rylee actually knows. She wouldn't really talk to her or even look at her and I didn't want her feelings to be hurt because of this. Finally I pulled Rylee aside and asked her if she remembered this person. She said "Sure Mama, sure I do" I said "Why don't you say hello to her? She has missed you and wanted to see you? Can you say Hi to her?" Rylee said "Who dis person Mama? Where this friend?" So I pointed to her (she was basically right in front of us) and Rylee said "I don't see her, she not here!" (pretending to not see her) So I told her that I thought she might be worried that she was going to go with this friend, but she would always stay with Mama. I told her that she could talk to her friend and play with her friend and that it was okay, she was not going back to China, she was staying with Mama! She finally said okay and went over by her friend. She interacted with her just a little during the two days and had a whole lot of fun learning to swim and playing with the other girls.

After they left and I had a chance to talk with Rylee about it I asked her if she remembered her friend. She said "Sure I do Mama, she take care of me just a little bit - like a tiny baby bit. She take me to play en park! She tell stories and sing. I not sing though cuz I just a little bit baby" "Lots I take care of myself China Mama" I asked her if she liked this friend and was glad to see her. Rylee said "Sure Mama I like her, she my friend, I stay Mama I LOVE you Mama! In China I big, I cook myself an make congee with banana. I have milk 1 cup an 1 cup water an mix it like this, I do it myself" she mimics stirring "Dis really good Mama!", surprised I said "You drank milk in China? Why don't you drink milk here?" Her answer - "You don't make 1 cup milk and 1 cup water Mama, dis bery yummy like dis!" I asked her what else she likes and she told me "Banana cookies! and noodles an mix vegbles together Mama dis bery yummy too!" (she does not eat veggies at all except corn!) "En soups mama, I like soups and flies (means rice)!

Some things we learned this weekend:

• The orphanage had a cow and the kids had fresh milk every day.
• Rylee was called by another name that means "Little Dragon or Dragon Baby", how appropriate is that!!!!
• She was able to roam the orphanage unattended and pretty much could do whatever she wanted. (this we had already figured out)
• Rylee was not as bossy in China (but given the nickname???)
• Rylee is an excellent actress (this we had already figured out also)
• Rylee likes milk (big shock to me)
• The kids had meat twice a week
• The orphanage grows their own vegetables
• Rylee had been in school for a couple of years and all the kids walked there by themselves
• In school they were treated differently because they did not have families
  

I am so very thankful to our new friends for giving us a glimps into our daughters past. What a blessing to be able to have this part of Rylee's past and to share it with her! Below are a few pictures from our trip...

**Rylee turns 5**

"Mama I big now, I five", Rylee states showing me all 5 fingers for emphasis. Suddenly she looks concerned "I Mama's little baby, right Mama?" I tell her that yes she is, and always will be, my little baby even though she is a big 5! "Okay Mama, it's okay!"

When she was asked what she wanted for her birthday she was 100% certain that she wanted a balloon and bubbles! I took her to pick out her balloons and she found one she wanted that had princesses on it and sang "Happy Birthday" when you hit it. Thank goodness she insisted on only wanting one because when we got to the check out we found out that this one balloon was like $15.00. Thank goodness she didn't want six :)

We get half way home with the treasured balloon and Rylee starts to get annoyed with the balloon. "Hey Mama this girl not singing right! She not say Rylee... she not say my name!" I said "Well Ry, she didn't know your name when she sang that song" so she pulls the balloon down even with her face and said "Hey you listen me! You not sing right, my name es Rylee, RYLEE! Say it now - do it right!! GO NOW!" and she smacks the balloon, eagerly waiting for her name to be announced in the middle of the song. I watch in the rear view mirror as her smile fades from her face as once again the princess sang the birthday song without putting Rylee's name in it. So yes, she continued to tell the balloon off then entire ride home, it was just too funny! She still loves the balloon, but is forever annoyed with the princesses for not singing the song correctly!

Summer break is in full swing here and the heat and humidity have arrived. The girls have discovered how to beat the heat - check out the slide show:

Way overdue update!!!

Gosh, it's been too long - where to even start? Bonding, eating issues, the non-stop chatter, Mother's Day, Rylee's upcoming 5th birthday, passing the 6 month home mark... hmmmm??? I think I will go with bonding and attachment. I think Rylee is bonding well with us and sometimes I think she really understands that we are her family. She questions everyone about how many babies they have and where they are, where they live and so on. If it is a man and a women, she will always ask the woman "Dis you Daddy?". We talk a lot about families and the role that each has in our home. How do you teach the concept of family to someone that has never had one? We spent the first months telling her that she is our baby, I am her Mama and so on. Now I ask her "Who's baby are you?" and she will tell me "Dis you baby Mama", and I ask her "Who's your Mama?" and she will point to me. She doesn't "family shop" anymore (you know... being on the lookout for a possible better family), unless maybe if they have a swimming pool. She tells me that she loves me "bery much" and that she "want stay wit Mama". For the first time the other day when someone asked her if she was their baby, she shook her head no (but a little uncertain) and said "I Mama's baby" and pointed to me. She looked at me for confirmation, I smiled and nodded at her, she broke out a huge grin and I broke out the Kleenex! She no longer refers to herself as Xiao Bao as in "Xiao Bao want this, Xiao Bao do this..." now it is "Poor Mama's Baby, Mama, I fall down." My favorite: "I love you, Mama!"

We went through about three months of really bad stuttering. The stuttering seems to be pretty much gone now and in its place is about a million words! She talks nonstop with her favorite questions being "Why". Here is a typical conversation:

Mama: "Come here Ry"
Rylee: "Why"
Mama: "Because, I need to talk to you"
Rylee: "Why, Mama?"
Mama: "Just come here, Rylee"
Rylee: "But why Mama?"
Mama: "Rylee, when Mama asks you to come here, you need to just come, not ask why"
Rylee: "Okay Mama, I commin' - but why?"
Mama: "Rylee, please just come here"
Rylee: "Yes Mama?"
Mama: "Thank you Rylee, now next time just come here when Mama asks you too, don't ask why"
Rylee: "Okay Mama, bye bye" as she takes off running.
Mama: "Rylee wait, we didn't talk about why I needed you in the first place!"
Rylee: "WHY Mama (not why did you need me in the first place, but why do I have to come back)?"
Mama: "Rylee what did I just tell you"
Rylee: "Oh I sorry Mama, you say don't say why, I say why - dis funny right?"
Mama: "No, this is not funny"
Rylee: "Why Mama, why not funny?"
....

Rylee was in her first horse show. She won a blue ribbon in lead line and also in the stick horse competition (see slideshow for photos). She was beaming the entire time and looked absolutely adorable. While she was waiting to enter the arena for the stick horse competition they announced the singer for the National Anthem. Rylee was standing by the gate along with many other people and I was a bit behind her. She hears the music start and waits for the first couple of words of the song and then at the quietest possible moment turns around to me and said "OH NO MAMA, I DON"T LIKE THIS SONG!!! MAMA, I DON'T LIKE THIS ONE!" Yep - that's my girl!!! Everyone turned around, but I just stared straight ahead... Unfortunately, the person standing next to me shook with silent laughter through the entire song. It made it very difficult to keep a straight face and pretend I didn't know who she was talking to ;)

Tennis Shoes or Flip Flops?

This morning when I picked Rylee up from school she stopped by the Directors Office (Ms. B) to get a sticker and say goodbye to her. Well, today there was a visitor in Ms. B's office (which by the way did not dissuade Rylee in the least from barging in and getting her sticker), who turned out to be the Regional Director. We spoke with him briefly and then he mentioned that Rylee should not be wearing flip flops to school. Rylee loves her flip flops and does not like closed shoes because they make her feet hot. I had already discussed this with the Director and we had compromised to let Rylee wear her flip flops to school but take her tennis shoes for outdoor play or any other time that they may be needed. I explained this to the Regional Director as well as telling him that I am choosing my battles right now, but he was pretty insistent that she not wear those shoes so I said okay, well then feel free to tell her that. He looked at me a little strangely and said "You want me to tell her?" I said "Sure, if you don't mind" at the same time I was biting the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing. I glanced at Ms. B but she could not even stop the grin from entering her face! So he turns to Rylee and tells her that she cannot wear those kind of shoes to school because her toes might get hurt. Rylee, who was concentrating on picking out just the right sticker looked at him, planted an amazingly adult looking scowl on her face and said "Huh? Mine no have ouchie!" He explained it to her again and she pointed at him "Where's you house? Xiao Bao no ouchie, Xiao Bao have dis one shoes, YOU NO SAY ME OUCHIE!" She proceeded to stare him down until he looked at me and told me that he has little kids of his own and that you just have to use a different psychology - at this point I am barely holding it together because I KNOW what is coming!!! I just managed a sort of grunt and turned back to Rylee. He tried again but Rylee stopped him mid-sentence "Where you house? You go you house and no tell mine no shoes!!! THIS NO OUCHIE!! Xiao Bao like Ms. B she no say ouchie, I smoocha her, I NO SMOOCHA YOU!!!" She went over and hugged Ms. B and gave her a kiss and pointed her finger again at the R.D. "DIS NO OUCHIE, Common Mama lets GO!!!" She grabbed my hand and pulled me out the door, shaking her head and sputtering the whole time about this man!

Xiao Bao wanna Mama!

Yesterday I unpacked a box that had a bunch of photos in it. Rylee saw this one and squealed "Oooooh mine love this one Mama! Can I have it?" We looked at the picture together and she told me that she loved this one (she is the assistant director at the orphanage). I asked Rylee what her name was, she thought about it for a while and then said "I dunno? Hmmmmm...", I asked her what she called her when she talked to her, she said "nothing". I don't know if she has forgotten or if she really never had a name to call her. Rylee was looking at the picture and the said "see this one smile Mama? Xiao Bao no smile." I said that I know, how come she looked so sad, was she sick or tired? She said "No, Xiao Bao not smile because Xiao Bao wanna Mama and you no come! Xiao Bao wanna you!"

She is very proud to have a Mama and I think she is starting to understand family. When we go somewhere if anyone even looks at her she will point to me and say "Dis MY Mama!", now she is starting to ask other people if they have babies. If they are with kids she will ask them "You dis one Mama - dis you baby?". Yesterday she asked if our dogs were her brothers. She is really thinking about this and trying to understand the connections.

We had our 6 month post placement visit the other night. It has only been 5 months, but we needed to get it started so we can be sure to get it in on time. When our social worker came in the door, Rylee immediately pulled her hand and told her that she wanted to show her "mine room". She showed her the bedrooms, playroom, a bathroom and then took her into the kitchen. She showed her were the food is, where we cook, where the water is and how we get it and the dishwasher. Now we did not tell her anything about this visit except to tell her that someone was coming over for a visit. It was so funny because she does NOT routinely show people around the house like that! After that she told everybody to sit down (told us and showed each of us where we were required to sit) and she disappeared into the bathroom to prepare herself for the performance. She called Jia Jia into the room and then Hanna popped back out to announce the famous horse rider that was about to make an appearance. She came out at full canter on a stick horse, made a few passes and waited until she heard the appropriate amount of applause before she disappeared again. When she came back out she turned into a cat. Now we would not have been surprised at a dog or a horse - but she has never been a cat before - not ever - and she has not been one since?!?!?! Our social worker didn't seem phased by any of this at all, so hopefully she will tell China that Rylee is adjusting very nicely to her new life as a performer/kitty!

A few photos from the past couple of months:

Rylee attended her first horse show!

Loving the new "bubble tub"!

First snow, Hanna has waited 2 years for this!

Hanging out with Minnie

Doesn't she look bigger?

I think her personality just shines through in this photo!

My new all time favorite song:

Sung to the tune of "Are You Sleeping"

Xiao Bao love Mama
Xiao Bao love Mama

Xiao Bao love you
Xiao Bao love you

Xiao Bao love JiaJia
Xiao Bao love JiaJia

Xiao Bao love Baba
Xiao Bao love Baba

Verse two:

Xiao Bao love you
Xiao Bao love you

Xiao Bao love Scruffy
Xiao Bao love Scrappy

Xiao Bao no juju (sleep)
Xiao Bao no juju (sleep)

Xiao Bao love you!
Xiao Bao love you!

Life has been a whirlwind this past month...

We have been out of touch without Internet for the past 10 days and have also had a very busy month! You may or may not know that just before we were to travel to China to bring Rylee home, Pat lost his job. We had to do anything possible to complete the adoption that we had been working towards for the past three years. This ended up to be that we had to accept a position about 600 miles away from the place we considered our home. We had to leave everything behind including our support system that we had in place for when we finally were able to bring Rylee home. We were devastated really, but did what we had to do to get our child. We were able to complete our adoption and tried to get settled in to our new area, it was okay but just not home. The transition was especially hard on our 8 year old, as she not only had to leave her school and friends but also her beloved horse, Minnie. She was a real trooper and we all tried to make the best of the situation. Well, a few weeks ago (about 4) we were offered the opportunity to return "home"! We are thrilled to be home and surrounded by our friends again and Rylee is settling in very nicely. She adores all of our friends and keeps trying to talk everyone in to "come to mine house!"

I will post more details later on how Rylee is doing and post new pictures. I just wanted to let everyone know why we sort of "disappeared" for a little while!