And no we are not talking about me... Rylee has been obsessed with what she calls her "moose-stachio!"
Let me back up a little bit.
A couple of weeks ago Rylee asked us (while in a restaurant eating dinner), if she has a mustache? I being the brave soul that I am, said "Ask your Dad." So she turned her questioning gaze on her father.
"DAD! I don't have a moosestachio do I?" We all look down at the table, and busy ourselves with the suddenly fascinating dinners that are sitting before us.
She stares us down.
Hanna caves first: "Yes, Rylee you do have a moosetachio, but really it's okay because I have a uni-brow!"
Rylee looks at her Dad: "DAD???"
He said "Don't look at me, your mother is the one that said you have a mustache!"
I consider dumping my dinner over his head...
I turn to her and said "I DID NOT say that you have a mustache, but if you really want to know you just need to look in the mirror yourself. What I am saying is that you are incredibly beautiful and perfect."
She looks at me "I know that Mom, but do I have a moosestachio or not?"
I sigh... "Rylee, eventually everyone has some form of a mustache - some are just easier to see than others..."
Why, oh why are we even having this conversation???
She puts fingers on her upper lip, rubbing up and down her brow crinkles and she announces in an extremely loud voice "I DO HAVE A MOOSETACHIO!!! WAAAAAAA"
People are looking... a lot of them...
I tell her we are done talking about this for now. Thankfully, she lets it go.
But not for long...
Two days later we are standing in the bathroom, doing her hair. She brings it up again. "Mom, do I really have a moosetachio?" I look at her for a minute trying to decide what I should do. Finally I hand her a little mirror and say "you tell me".
She studies herself from every angle.
Than she glares at me "I DO have a moosestachio, and it is big, and dark, and you can see it really good! WHY didn't you tell me this mother? We have to do something about this right now! Make it lighter Mom or I know, lets pull it out..." She runs for the tweezers.
"No Rylee, we are not pulling it out! Listen to me... Everyone has this, your hair is just really dark, so it shows up a little bit more. But it really is not very noticeable at all baby, and you are perfect just the way you are."
She narrows her eyes at me, with a stubborn look on her face that tells me in no uncertain terms - she's not buying it!
"Think about it Mom, think about it! We need to do something about this!" I distract her with other things, which works for a while. But not really...
She has now been studying the upper lips of all the girls at school. I now know which ones have nothing there, which ones have very light hair and I also know that there is not another girl in THE ENTIRE school that has a moosetachio like Rylee. I know this because I get a daily report from her.
This morning as she heads out the door, she brings it up again. "We ARE doing something about this today Mother!" I groan... she growls...